My baby girl (12 years old) and I are in love with Ed Sheeran.
We listen to him while we bake together,
or when we’re hanging out in the kitchen,
often singing with him,
and occasionally breaking into a dance.
OMG have I told you what my two teen girls do?
When I start dancing around the house to their music,
Which happens very often, I have to admit,
They surreptitiously pull out their phones,
And post it on Snapchat for all their friends to see!!
I’m choosing to make it mean they think I’m a really cool mom.
Apparently their friends agree.
(Even with the strongest mind management skills in the world,
I could not make it mean that they think I’m a great dancer.)
This morning, on the way to school, she was singing
“Oh-I-Oh-I-Oh-I I’m in love with your body…..”
Notwithstanding my opinions about the message in this song,
It’s a catchy tune, and I j0ined her.
But I changed one word.
My version goes
“Oh-I-Oh-I-Oh-I I’m in love with my body…..”
She looked at me.
With that look I choose to interpret to mean that she thinks I’m a really cool mom.
What? I asked her.
Listen, it’s just as easy to love your body as it is to hate your body.
It’s a decision.
It’s got nothing to do with the shape of your body,
Or what anyone else thinks about it.
It’s just so much easier to move through life in a body you love.
So love it.
There. It’s that simple.
Yes, I see your cellulite,
And your flabby bits.
I see the scars, the moles, the droops.
I have those too.
Nothing at all to do with the lovability of my body.
There’s no objective measure of lovability.
I know there’s a culturally agreed upon measure of lovability.
But I know that you’re a thinking person,
Who evaluates what your culture tells you to believe.
So use that skill here.
Lovability is a personal decision.
And I choose to love my body (and yours).
My body doesn’t have to earn my love
By looking a certain way or being a certain size.
Lovability doesn’t have to pass any test.
It just has to feel better.
And moving through the world in a body I love
Feels soooo much better than doing so in a body I hate.