“It’s just once a year.”

“It’s tradition at this time of year.”

How many indulgences do you satisfy with this just ‘once a year’ thought?
I’m guessing more than one?

Think hard about this.

I know candy canes only come around once a year.
And believe me, that’s our tradition at this time of year.

Buy and eat everything and anything that has crushed candy canes in it.

New Year’s Eve in Florida – sharing a tub (or three) of Haagen Dazs peppermint bark ice cream with our friends.
Godiva AND Williams Sonoma Peppermint Bark every time we go to the mall.
And OMG, Hershey Kisses just came out with their own version!
Now we’ll have to add that to the annual “just once a year” tradition.
Which can easily last an entire month
(Did I mention that we recently bought out the entire stock of kisses last night?
We need to eat them, bake with them, and grate them to sprinkle on hot chocolate)

It’s so much fun.

It’s tradition.

And there’s really nothing wrong with these traditions,
because they aren’t having any adverse effect on anyone in my family.
No-one is overeating (although it may sound like it from my above description!)
As my kids, thankfully, are not overeaters,
And I stay especially mindful at this time of year to make sure I don’t.

So we don’t need to question them.

But you may have some food traditions that are not serving you.

What are you fattening thoughts about this time of year?
”Mince pies and cookies are tradition”?
“It’s tradition to drink lots of wine at parties”?

If eating mince pies (or peppermint bark) and drinking lots of wine doesn’t interfere with your weight loss goal, then enjoy it with all your heart.

If you know that it’s going to ruin your weight loss goals,
And you’re going to regret it in the morning,
I have some suggestions for you:

Ask yourself:
“Is this really what makes my holiday special?”
“Is this really the purpose of your parties and get togethers?”

If you answer is no, then do the following:

Consider:
How else can I make this holiday special?
Find values,  emotions, and goals that can be met without any food at all. Think of things like  connection, ease, relaxation, meaningful conversations, quiet and space, cozy fires, and family gatherings. I find that if I’m focused on eating food that my body does not want (although my mind and tastebuds might), I’m distracted from the people and conversation – I’m in my head fighting with myself or else I’ve left myself altogether because I’m pretending I can’t see myself stuffing my face with all that food. Even worse, when I feel overly full, and have heartburn, I’m really disconnected from the people I am with. Not special at all.

How can I enjoy this time of year AND lose weight?
When we ask our brain open-ended questions like this, and we are open to believing it’s true, our creative brain goes to work to find answers for us. Imagine yourself waking up on Jan 1 feeling light and proud and vibrant. Imagine this many times throughout the day. See yourself easily saying no to mince pies (or a fourth mince pie) and notice how great that feels to you.

Ask yourself:
So what?
So what if this food only comes around once a year? So what if I never eat it again? You may be surprised at your answer. When I pose this question to my weight loss clients, their answer is usually, after some thought “so nothing”. So my life will be the same, and I’ll be freeer. Amazing what we find when we are willing to question our thinking.

Here’s to holidays that are filled with connection – to yourself and the people around you.

Next week, I’m going to tell you the most fattening thought I hear from people who are alone during the holidays.

P.S. I’ve just created a worksheet to help my Hunger Games students find their fattening thoughts – email me for a copy and I’ll coach you on it. Just because. Helping people is one of the ways I make my holiday special xo